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Posts from November 2013

A Man Butt-Dials His Employee as He's Hiring a Hitman to Kill Him
We've heard of guys accidentally butt-dialing the cops while they're buying or selling drugs.  This takes BUTT-DIALING IDIOTS to a WHOLE new level.
68-year-old Larry Barnett of Jonesboro, Arkansas owns a car dealership called Legend Motor Company.  And last Thursday, he butt-dialed a former employee . . . just as he was hiring a HITMAN to KILL the guy.  It's not clear why Larry hated him so much that he wanted him dead.  But as the guy listened, he heard Larry tell the hitman where he lived.  Then he heard, quote, "I don't care if you have to burn his house to the ground with him in it.  I don't care what you have to do, make it look like an accident."  So the guy called the cops.  They came to his house, found his gas stove had been tampered with, and Larry was arrested for conspiracy to commit murder.  

(ABC 8 - Jonesboro)  
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A Burglar Cuts Himself And the People He's Trying to Rob Save His Life
Around 6:00 A.M. Thursday morning, a guy in Salt Lake City named Pablo Solorio woke up to the sound of a window shattering . . . which turned out to be a 20-year-old BURGLAR.  (His name hasn't been released.)
But while he was climbing through the window he'd broken, he cut his arm, and severed an ARTERY.  So instead of yelling at the guy to get out, Pablo immediately realized he needed MEDICAL attention.  Pablo and his stepfather took him to the bathroom, and stopped the bleeding.  Pablo's girlfriend called 911, and paramedics were able to save the guy's life.  Oddly enough, Pablo had actually MET the burglar less than a week earlier.  So when the guy saw Pablo, he said hello and talked about how great it was to see him again.  (???)  He claimed he WASN'T robbing the place . . . and said he HAD to jump through the window to get away from some people who were chasing him.  Except that he was holding Pablo's video game console at the time, so that excuse didn't really work.  As of Friday, the guy was still in the hospital.  Police said he'd be charged with burglary as soon as he was released.  

(KSL.com / KUTV.com)
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A Woman Got Upset Over Her Missing Phone And Set an Apartment on Fire
It sucks when you can't find your phone.  Frustrating, even.  But this might be a SLIGHT overreaction.
On Friday, 21-year-old Manuella Lopez was at a friend's apartment in East Harlem, New York and couldn't find her cell phone.  And she went into a state of PURE RAGE.  We're not sure if she thought her friend had taken the phone, or she was just so upset it was missing that she needed to get revenge on the universe . . . but she decided to set the apartment ON FIRE.  She grabbed some of her friend's clothes, tossed them on the floor, poured gas on them, then tossed her lit cigarette on the pile.  Firefighters responded to the scene, but not before five people were injured . . . including an INFANT with minor burns.  One of the others was a man in the apartment with Lopez . . . he's still hospitalized in critical condition.  Lopez was arrested for assault, arson, reckless endangerment, and criminal mischief.  There's no word whether her phone has turned up.  

(New York Daily News)
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A Man Tazed His Wife After She Lost Monday Night Football Bet
When Green Bay Packers quarterback AARON RODGERS got hurt on the first drive of "Monday Night Football", it pretty much sunk the Packers' chances of beating the Chicago Bears. 
It also caused one married couple to have the worst night of their lives.  42-year-old John Grant of Tinley Park, Illinois is a big Bears fan.  And his wife Nicole is a big Packers fan.  So they made a bet on the game . . . the winner got to use a STUN GUN on the loser for three seconds.  They watched at a bar in Mayville, Wisconsin, and both John and Nicole were VERY drunk.  After the Bears won, Nicole agreed to her tazing.  A cell phone video apparently showed her laughing as she stood there with her arms up.  Then John TAZED his wife on her BUTTOCKS.  It was over her clothes, but still left a BURN MARK on her butt cheek.  At that point, she STOPPED being cool with the bet . . . and called the cops.  John was arrested for felony possession of an electric weapon, which carries a max sentence of SIX YEARS in prison.  

(The Smoking Gun)
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A Family With The Last Name "Krueger" Named Baby "Freddy"
If your last name is KRUEGER, it's gotta be SLIGHTLY tempting to name your kid "Freddy," right?  Maybe not.  But this family just got an extra reason.
On HALLOWEEN, a guy in Alexandria, Louisiana named John Krueger and his girlfriend, Jessica Briley, had a baby boy.  And if there was even a question whether or not to name the kid "Freddy," having him on Halloween definitely sealed it.  Plus, John's great-grandfather's name was Fred.  I mean, come on.   So John and Jessica named their son Frederick Jack Krueger.  Both Freddy Krueger and his mom are doing well.   

(Alexandria Town Talk)
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