Back on the 14th, 53-year-old Michael Williams of Sumter, South Carolina went to Applebee's for lunch. We're guessing he wasn't on a Valentine's Day lunch date, but you never know. He tried to pay with his debit card, but it was declined. So Michael offered to pay in cash . . . and pulled a TRILLION DOLLAR BILL out of his wallet. Somehow, the staff figured out it wasn't real and they called the cops. Michael wasn't arrested for using a fake bill, though . . . turns out he had an outstanding contempt of court charge so they arrested him for that.